One of the greatest ways to daddy your daughter is by taking her everywhere you go when you are at home in the evenings or on the weekends. Any kind of errands or whatever. When you are at work, take her with you from time to time. If you are self-employed, let her work for you during the summer. That is invaluable training and she will learn so much by just watching how you operate with other people. Not to be harsh, but if you aren't willing to spend time with her, you probably shouldn't have had children. These are part of the responsibilities that come from being a father and a real man. The benefits of spending time with her are eternal!
I know we guys often look at errands as an opportunity to get away from the house and to have some time to ourselves, but you are missing huge opportunities to teach your daughter all sorts of things. These things oftentimes occur on a whim. I call these teachable moments. I often go to one of my favorite stores, the Home Depot and it's fun taking either my 14 yr old or my 10 yr old along. They get to hear about things that men are generally interested in, not just from a daddy's point of view, but from a man's point of view. You know...building things, fixing things, replacing things, tearing things down and so on. I really enjoy taking them with me...it's a lot of fun!
As an example, years ago while shopping with one of my older children, it was a very windy day and when I got out of the car, the wind ripped my door right out of my hand slamming it into the car next to me. As my child sat there watching to see what I would do, it was clear I had to not only do the right thing, but also set the right example for her. So I wrote a note apologizing to the owner of the car for dinging their door leaving my name and number for them to call me. The cool thing is that they never called me! This has actually happened to me more than once. It is amazing how things sometimes work out when you choose to do the right thing. Either way, my conscience was clear and I had been given an opportunity to demonstrate to my daughter a real example of living by the Golden Rule..."do unto others as you would have them do unto you".
The main point of all of this is that teachable moments don't always happen just by hanging around the house. You have to go out and experience these moments with your daughter. In those moments you have a chance to show her right from wrong and to teach her wisdom. She is looking to see if you are a man of character and integrity and trust me, even if they don't what those mean, they are watching you. Plus she learns one moment at a time, what you stand for and what you believe in. Better she learn from you than on her own in the world. You can never put a price on that!
So the next time you go to the Home Depot or the grocery store or wherever, take that precious gift with you!
Fresh Starts
11 years ago
