I know that in the past I placed a lot of emphasis on dads doing a bunch of girly things with their daughters like playing with Barbies, etc. And if you really want to have a good relationship with your daughter, don't think you will ever get out of doing those things. Haven't met a little girl yet that doesn't love playing Barbies with her daddy. Thank goodness, they do eventually outgrow them...whew!!! However, I was reminded that they really enjoy doing many "guy" things too...things I like doing like playing catch, riding bikes, going on "adventures" in the wildlife refuge near our home, etc. And more importantly, they like doing these things with me! The point here is that girls just yearn to be with their daddies no matter what the activity is!
So last weekend I invited two of my daughters, age 14 and 10, to play catch with me...a traditional male kind of activity. You know, throwing the ball so hard at each other that even with a glove on it stings when it hits the palm of your hand. Even as I am writing this I feel the testerone rushing through my veins. You know the feeling, right? But wait, I need to digress for a minute...
When my 26 year old married daughter was around 12 or 13 years old, she and I were playing catch with a softball. Believe me, don't ever sell your daughter's strength and abilities short. She knew how to burn those pitches in and could probably throw a softball around 40 to 50 miles an hour. So she throws one at me and it went high, deflecting off of an overhead electrical wire and straight at my mouth. When it hit, blood went everywhere and I think she thought she had seriously maimed me for life. Man, I thought so too! I couldn't feel my lips or my teeth. Quite honestly, I didn't know if I still had any teeth! Because my wife was busy cooking dinner for the rest of our children and we had a baby sleeping, I had to drive myself to the emergency room to get stitches. That was one of those "tough guy" moments...an experience I will not soon forget! We still laugh about that to this day. (No, I wasn't laughing at the time!!!)
Anyway, back to my 14 and 10 year olds...
We spent over an hour just throwing and hitting the softball. Both of my girls are really good hitters. My 14 yr old does an amazing job of throwing and catching the ball. She has a really good eye! Here we are playing catch and I realize...wow, how cool, I have a totally captive audience. No cellphones or texting or any other kind of distractions. Just one on one with me and my girls. We had so much fun that day!
When you have times like that, teach them your values. Teach them principles of success like "winners never quit and quitters never win" or whatever else comes to mind that fits the moment. But, also let them know that even when they mess up, like continually missing the ball or throwing wild pitches over and over, that you still love them...unconditionally. Praise them when they do well and encourage and comfort them when they don't.
The Bible says there is "life and death in the power of the tongue", so as a father it is vital that we use the power of our words to encourage our daughters to be all God created them to be. Doing simple things like playing catch or just hanging out with them gives you tremendous opportunities to transform their lives and the way they think.
Teach them the only way they will ever appreciate success is by experiencing failure or as I prefer to call it, "learning experiences". Teach them how to take wise risks and that nothing great was ever achieved by doing nothing!
Now, take a "wise" risk and go play catch with your daughter!
No comments:
Post a Comment